Tuesday, September 24, 2019

It's 2:07 pm I got to get the kids soon but...

I had to say this before I go to get my boys... I go through Facebook and I go through Twitter and I see people's posts and it literally hurts my ❤.  Everyone has a right to their opinion but when an opinion is plain old hate (and maybe I've been guilty of it too) I just don't know.  I don't know why people can't just wake up and realize we are all just human why do we have to kill over oil and wealth why can't we just exist to be happy? Love each other and just exist instead of existing to be a part of something that most of us will never truly be a part of? I don't want to be a part of the world we live in!  I have to raise two independent men to be a part of that world because i don't know how to detach from it in a healthy appropriate way!  In the end it all comes to 💰 this spiritual awakening that is happening is also being commercialized and monetized by people like Oprah and Deepak Chopra which makes me sick why should one have to pay $2000 or more to get spiritualy connected with "God" and each other it saddens and sickens me.  If i want to detach from society I need money to do it- to buy an island or a ridiculous plot of land to buy plants and trees to live off of it's crazy to me!! Well I guess that's all for 2:07 pm on Tuesday possibly another post later or next week I'll try to be more consistent this time to retain my audience!!

"America Will Never Be A Socialist Country"

Wow isn't it funny/scary that in the same 24 hour period that I announce on my new blog I'm a socialist president Trump announces that "America will never be a socialist country" how freaking weird there are WAY 2 many coincidences in my life!!

Monday, September 23, 2019

Quick Rundown of Me [but not nearly all of it]

Ok u ready?!? Lol!? I've dabbled on n off with drugs and alcohol my whole life crack was introduced to me at 17 I'm 41 I live in Baltimore when I was 29 right b4 my 30th bday I moved to NC had a nice apartment a good job an awesome car and friends - the most I did was happy hour and weed i met my kids dad and that next year I was pregnant and then again the following year kids were born 12/08 and 12/09 the relationship with their father in between was toxic n still is basically bc he's a piece of crap - so after I had my kids I would go out on a Friday or Saturday and drink after I had my second son I worked for the census here in MD but got work comp from it had moved in with this guy and we drank he smoked weed and I kept refusing bc I was a mom now but eventually ppl convinced me everyone does it so i did and if I had just smoked weed no alcohol no pills I would've been ok but that wasn't the case so he and I broke up and this guy in my neighborhood asked me if I wanted to smoke some crack so from 2010-2016 I had a roaring crack habit in and out of rehab always had my kids when I wasn't in rehab couldn't work bc I had no one to watch my kids and by the time I would've paid for daycare it would've taken my whole check so I went on disability around 2012 and in 2017 they cut it off im in the process of trying to get it back I can't work bc I have a warrant in Austin and now have a drug conviction - in July 2016 my kids n I moved to Kingsland TX which is an hour from Austin I had quit methadone cold turkey bc there weren't any clinics in that small town n No one to drive me an hour to get it I started drinking and smoking weed along with a lil kratom then in Oct 1st 2016 I tried meth by smoking and by Oct 31st I was in ICU my dad had taken my kids from me and in Nov I went to austin to meet a guy and got stranded in July 2017 my mom had the cops pick my kids up from my dad and flew them back to MD I stated homeless till Oct 2018 and ended up coming back to Baltimore with my mom and kids and like 4 nights ago my mom's car was repossessed bc she had to retire to take care of my kids and now she supports all 3 of us bc I cant work n don't have my disability so she's also about to lose her house. 

Writer's Block

 So I started writing my book and basically got 1 page of the first book done and I need to turn the manuscript in by the 27th ugh... I don&...